A Deep Pain within the Heart
by Mstang23
Summary: We could die. SHE could die. Yahiko shuddered inwardly at the thought. Life without Konan just didn't seem possible. She was everything. She was his life, his past, his future, the only one who was like him. He loved her.


Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto, though I wish I did (: All rights go to their original owners.

...

It was a dark and cold night. An unnatural haze hovered over the entrance of the cave where Yahiko and Konan were. In his bed, Yahiko shivered.

"Here comes the season Konan and I were dreading most…" Yahiko thought to himself.

He tossed and turned for a while, then shivered again and sat up in his sleeping bag. After a few minutes, he sighed and slowly stood up. He knew it was useless trying to sleep when it obviously wasn't going to happen. He grabbed his jacket off the ground, and dragged his feet, walking out of the cave.

"Maybe some fresh air might help clear my head…" Yahiko mumbled to himself.

He put his hands in his pockets and headed towards the dense forest that surrounded their "home."

…...

The sound of rustling woke Konan. She looked up and saw Yahiko slowly get out of his sleeping bag and head towards the entrance of the cave. She sat up, debating whether or not she should pursue him. He looked unsettled, but maybe these were the kind of things he liked to deal with on his own. But, her curiosity got the best of her and she quietly stood up and tentatively took a few cautious steps outside the cave, peeking her head out looking for Yahiko. She felt a deep shiver. She hadn't realized it was this cold. Yahiko wasn't in sight, but there were a few footprints in the moist dirt path leading west of the cave. Konan slowly followed the footprints, trying to hold back the intense chattering that her teeth were making. She pulled a tree branch back and saw Yahiko sitting against a tree, staring off into the distance. They were at the top of a cliff, and you could see for miles and miles, and the moon bathed the scene with almost an eerie silver glow.

"…Yahiko?" Konan called out quietly.

Yahiko looked up slightly, then an inaudible sentence came out of his mouth and he looked back down. Konan had a worried look on her face. Yahiko wasn't normally like this. He was always the laughing one, the one who made her feel better after all the pain the war has caused. She didn't like seeing him like this. Yahiko looked up again, and was surprised to see the expression on Konan's face. He immediately felt bad for ignoring her like that.

"I'm sorry." He said, looking down.

Konan was confused.

"Sorry for what?"

Still looking at the ground, Yahiko replied,

"For ignoring you like that."

Konan smiled a weak smile and started walking towards him.

"It's alright."

She sat down next to him. It was silent for a few minutes before Konan spoke, gazing at the scene in front of her.

"So why did you come out here?"

Yahiko sighed and replied,

"Couldn't sleep."

"Hn."

He looked at her quizzically. It was obvious she knew that wasn't the only reason why he came out here.

"So why did you follow me?"

Konan broke her gaze and looked at Yahiko.

"I was worried."

"Hn."

Konan broke out into another weak smile, which ended up looking more like a grimace.

Another few silent minutes passed.

"I know there's something on your mind."

Konan spoke, looking straight at Yahiko.

Yahiko was taken aback.

"Does she really know me that well?" He thought to himself.

He broke out of his daze and realized Konan was still staring at him. He felt himself beginning to blush. He quickly turned away.

Konan kept looking at him. Eventually, he sighed.

"Fine. I'm worried."

Konan had a confused look on her face.

"Worried about what?"

Yahiko kept looking at the ground.

"I'm worried about you Konan."

Konan looked taken aback.

"Why?" she asked, staring at him intently. He felt his cheeks flush red from embarrassment.

"It's almost winter Konan. Once it starts getting colder, I don't know what we'll do. We have nowhere to go and no money. We'll be trapped here and day by day it'll keep getting colder, and sooner or later one of us will get sick, and…"

He trailed off, looking off at something that only he could see.

Konan understood what he meant. She looked at the ground for a few moments, before looking back up.

"If you honestly think I'd allow myself to die that way, you do not know me at all Yahiko." She said with a smirk.

Yahiko looked back up, surprised that she just took the idea so lightly. We could die. SHE could die. Yahiko shuddered inwardly at the thought. Life without Konan just didn't seem possible. She was everything. She was his life, his past, his future, the only one who was like him. He couldn't IMAGINE living without her. He loved her too much for that. They were friends of course, they'd been together for as long as he could remember, but he didn't want to be friends. He wanted to be more. He'd kept his feelings locked up so long it was painful to look at her now, knowing she probably didn't return the same feelings. She probably considered him the brother she never had. Yup, that was it. He was doomed to be nothing more than a friend to her. That's how it always has been, and always will be. He felt a sharp pain deep inside of him. Just a friend….

"Yahiko! Hey, wake up!"

Konan was shaking his shoulder slightly. He felt a tingle when she touched him. "What am I thinking? We're friends, that's it!" He thought to himself. Yahiko shook his head.

"Sorry, I must've zoned out for a minute."

"It was well more than a minute, Yahiko."

Yahiko blushed. "Ugh there has to be a limit to how much you can blush in one day." He thought to himself.

Konan looked at him.

"Are you okay? You look a little red. Are you sick?"

She asked placing the back side of her hand against his cheek. Yahiko felt himself get even redder. When she touched his cheek, it was like an electric charge surging through his body. God she was so beautiful. The way the moonlight shone on her pale skin and blue hair was almost unbearable. He felt his heart rate increasing at the thought Konan was so close to him. Konan was still staring at him intently. Yahiko's eyes met hers. They held gazes for what seemed like eternity, even though it probably wasn't more than a minute or so. Yahiko's gaze slowly traveled down to her lips. He looked at them with a hunger, almost need. Konan felt her insides turn to butter. She had butterflies so violent it felt like she might throw up, but in a good way. Yahiko couldn't seem to help himself. He was staring at her lips, forgetting about everything else. Konan felt her face heating up. After a few moments, she was the first to break the gaze with a nervous laugh and pulling back. Her face was so red; she swore she could've passed for a tomato. Yahiko realized what he was doing and slapped himself inwardly.

"I'm such an idiot!" He thought to himself.

They both sat there awkwardly for a few minutes before Yahiko spoke.

"I-I'm sorry, about th-that."

Konan was getting even redder.

"It's alright."

They sat for a few more akward moments.

Yahiko couldn't think of a way to say anything, after what he had just done. "Idiot!" he kept repeating in his head, mentally slapping himself. While he was busy torturing himself, Konan was desperately trying to stop blushing. Her heart rate was practically beating out of her chest. She was such an idiot! Why did she laugh and pull away? "My whole life I've dreamt of kissing him, and then when the moment finally came, I laugh like a moron and push him away? UGH IM SUCH AN IDIOT!" Konan kept thinking desperately to herself. She kept replaying the whole scene in her head. She had come so close, then BLAM. She just had to ruin it like the moron she was. She gave an involuntary shiver. She had forgotten how cold it was in the heat of the moment, now her teeth were practically chattering. Yahiko looked over and saw Konan with her knees pressed up against her chest shivering. He sighed and took off his jacket and reached over to put it around Konan's shoulders. Konan snapped out of her daze and gasped as she felt his hands on her shoulders. Yahiko felt her tense up under his touch. "Again, I'm SUCH an IDIOT. I could've just given her the jacket…" He mentally slapped himself again. Konan felt herself tense up and a few seconds later Yahiko did too. She was blushing fiercly. Yahiko slowly went back to his position by the tree, looking very akward. Konan looked at his jacket. It was really warm, and it smelled just like him too, oddly comforting. But she felt bad. Why should he get a cold and she doesn't? Just because she was so much weaker..she sighed.

"You should really take the jacket back. It's not fair that you get a cold and I don't." Konan said, looking at Yahiko.

Yahiko was a little surprised.

"Huh?"

"I'd feel bad if you got a cold because of me."

Yahiko smiled and laughed.

Konan was surprised. What's so funny about him getting a cold?

"You worry too much Konan."

"I can't help it."

Yahiko laughed again.

Konan smiled a small smile. This was the Yahiko she loved.

"Wait did I just say 'love'? No, that's not it. I just like him a little that's all, I'm sure he doesn't like me more than a friend."

A deep pain inside her heart.

"This place is so beautiful."

Konan looked up to see a smiling Yahiko looking at the land before them.

"It sure is."

Konan smiled and looked up at Yahiko, who was now standing and looking at the land.

He smiled back.

Konan pushed herself up and stood next to Yahiko.

When their hands brushed, she felt her heart pound so loud, she was sure Yahiko could hear it. A light blush crept over her pale features. Yahiko smiled slightly to himself. He felt a deep pain in his heart, knowing he could never have her. Konan noticed the change in his mood and looked at him. He had a pained look on his face.

"Yahiko-kun, what's wrong?"

He looked down at her, feeling his heart tear in two.

"I can't say."

Konan was hurt.

"What do you mean you can't say? We share everything. What can you possibly not be able to say to me?"

"You'd never think of me the same."

"Of course I would, Yahiko-Kun. I love you, and nothing will ever change that."

Yahiko's eyes widened.

"You….you love me?" He whispered, staring into her eyes.

Konan mentally slapped herself. Why did I just say that? Now he's never going to think of ME the same because he knows my secret. How could I be so stupid as to just let that slip out?

Konan gaped at Yahiko, getting redder by the second. "She obviously hadn't meant to say that," Yahiko thought, smirking to himself. But still, he was overjoyed. "She loves me.." he thought smiling to himself. "But maybe she meant like a brother or a friend or something." Yahiko felt his smile vanish. He was brought back to reality when Konan started talking again.

"I-I-I..Uh.."

Yahiko chuckled. Seeing her embarrassed like this was amusing in a way.

Konan attempted to change the subject.

"So what were you going to tell me?"

Yahiko's smile vanished and was replaced with a look of self-doubt.

"I can't say."

Konan was getting irritated.

"WHY can't you tell me?"

"I just can't."

Konan crossed her arms and glared at Yahiko. She was pissed. They share everything together, why won't he tell her?

"What are you hiding from me?" She said with a death glare.

Yahiko was bewildered. She had never gotten angry at him before.

"Wh-What do you mean?"

Konan kept glaring.

"Don't play stupid, you're obviously hiding something. What is it?"

"I-I don't get what you mean."

"Really, you're gonna keep playing that card, huh? I'm not stupid. I know you don't want me to know something. I told you everything. I don't know why, but I figured you'd do the same and not keep secrets from me."

Yahiko couldn't believe what he was hearing. He HAD told her everything. Except for one thing he could never express into words.

Konan spoke again, ice coating her every word.

"You know I thought I had finally found somebody who understood me, who would share everything with me as I did for them. But obviously I was wrong. Goodbye Yahiko."

He just stared at her. He was blown away. This couldn't be reality, this had to be a dream. A very bad dream. Konan started to turn away but before she could she felt a strong a hand grab her shoulder and turn her around. Before she had time to react, two hands cupped her face and Yahiko's lips crashed onto her lips. If it hadn't been for the two hands holding onto her face, she probably would've collapsed. Her eyes widened and she partially gasped, opening her lips slightly. Yahiko took advantage of this and almost forced his way in. The way he kissed her, it was almost like an animal. His lips felt needing. Like he was hungry for more, and would stop at nothing to get it. He pulled her face closer to him, bruising her lips, although, in an odd way, she didn't mind. His tongue traced the inside of her mouth, and she found herself dancing along with it. She threw her arms up around his neck, grabbing a hold of his hair and pulled him closer. He happily obliged. She felt the hands fall from her face and trace their way down to her hips, grabbing them and pulling her so close she felt their hips touched. By now Konan had already melted. Whatever Yahiko had in mind, she wouldn't be able to stop him, or herself for that matter. But he had stopped kissing her so roughly. Now his lips felt so soft and sweet, it felt completely different. She couldn't figure out which one she liked better. Her hands had gone limp and were now dangling helplessly over his shoulders. His kisses now were softer and slower, and he had begun to retract his tongue and slowly pulled his lips away from hers. She unwillingly pulled away too. She realized she was panting for air, as was he. Her face was flushed, and seemed to have forgotten how to breathe correctly. Yahiko was flushed, and couldn't believe what he just did. He struggled for air and to regain his composure. Konan's arms slid off of Yahiko and Yahiko's grip on her waist loosened. They slowly unattached and stood next to each other. After a few minutes, Konan spoke.

"Is that what you wanted to tell me?"

"….Yes."

Konan hugged Yahiko and whispered,

"I love you."

Yahiko's heart rate increased dramatically. He hugged her back and whispered in her ear,

"I love you too."

…..

Well, what do you think? Leave a review if you want (: I do take requests, but only if I've seen the show, and I know the most about Naruto so it would probably be best if you asked me for that show (: This is my first story, I hope you like it (:


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